i know its not time for this but this is pretty funny:
Things That Sound Dirty At Thanksgiving, But Aren’t
“Whew, that’s one terrific spread!”
“I’m in the mood for a little dark meat.”
“Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.”
“Talk about a huge breast!”
“It’s Cool Whip time!”
“If I don’t undo my pants, I’ll burst!”
“Are you ready for seconds yet?”
“Are you going to come again next time?”
“It’s a little dry, do you still want to eat it?”
“Just wait your turn, you’ll get some!”
“Don’t play with your meat.”
“Just spread the legs open & stuff it in.”
“Do you think you’ll be able to handle all these people
at once?”
“I didn’t expect everyone to come at once!”
“You still have a little bit on your chin.”
“Use a nice smooth stroke when you whip it.”
“How long will it take after you stick it in?”
“You’ll know it’s ready when it pops up.”
By: forever~n~always
Source: http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20070406203612AAXYDbP
keyword: thanksgiving jokes dirty
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She offered her honor.
He honored her offer.
So all night long, it was,
honor and offer,
honor and offer.
what starts with f and ends with uck?
firetruck!!!
The sky was blue,
The moon was high,
We were alone
Just she and I.
Her hair was brown,
Her eyes were blue,
I knew just what
She wanted me to do.
So, with all my courage
I did my best.
I placed my hand
Upon her breast.
I trembled; I shook,
And felt her heart,
Slowly she spread
Her legs apart.
I knew she was ready
but I didn’t know how!
This was my first experience
At milking a cow.
Hello, you’ve reached Jim and Sonya. We can’t pick up the phone right now, because we’re doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right… real slowly. So leave a message, and when we’re done brushing our teeth we’ll get back to you.
My wife and I can’t come to the phone right now, but if you’ll leave your name and number, we’ll get back to you as soon as we’re finished
“Wanna hear something dirty? A kid fell in a mud puddle!”
OK here’s one …
There was a beautiful princess who lived under a terrible curse. Everything she touched would melt. Her father the King proclaimed that if any man could give her a gift that would not melt, she would marry that man.
One man came and brought a fine sword of hardest steel … but it melted as she touched it. Another brought fine diamonds, the hardest known gem … but they melted at her touch just the same. No one could bring her a gift that did not melt.
Finally, a young lad came to the princess and said, “Put your hand in my pocket, and there you will find a gift.” The princess put her hand in the young man’s pocket … and felt something hard and smooth … and it did *NOT* melt at her touch! With great joy, the two of them were married.
What did the young man have in his pocket?
***
He had M&M’s … because they melt in your mouth, not in your hand! SHAME ON YOU!!
http://lnk.in/4mfw
A:A boy fell in a mud puddle!